Why I’m NEVER Having Kids

Why I’m NEVER Having Kids #4: The Struggling Baby Seat

March 6, 2008 · No Comments

So I’m at the bank yesterday to deposit some money into my checking account. It’s 3:30 PM, and the Wachovia banks in Atlanta close at 4 PM. Consequently, everybody and their mama’s mama is usually there trying to get checks cashed or deposited, and yesterday was no exception.

I’m standing in this long line waiting to see a teller, and I hear this wining noise coming from my right. 3 people behind me, there is a woman standing there, with a baby in a stroller.

First off, this had to be one of the more unattractive babies I have seen in a while – his face just looked like hell. At any rate, his mom bent down to re-fasten his belt so he wouldn’t fall out the seat. As soon as she was done, the baby started swaying back and forth, trying desperately to escape the seat.

Unfortunately, he was unsuccessful. And you know what that means – baby went from small sniffles of protest to outright crying.

“Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!” That lil’ boy’s screams echoed throughout the bank and bounced off the walls. By this time I was at the teller, and we both stared at the kid in slight disbelief.

The lady teller turns to me and says, “I bet you can’t wait until you have one of those.”

My reply: “Oh, I’m not having any kids.”

Her response: “Hey, I’ve been married 3 years, and I NEVER plan on having kids either.”

Ah, finally – a woman who agrees! They DO exist!

-A.P. Taylor

Send your “Why I’m NEVER Having Kids” stories to neverhavingkids@gmail.com.

Categories: Babies · Children · Dad · Family · Kids · Mom · Parent · People · Teenagers
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